Social isolation

In today's paper an article about elderly people being socially isolated.

This is so sad and I am sure is because of families leaving their home towns and making lives in other places.

This did not happen in earlier times (and still does not in some families) and the families would gather round and share looking after their elderly family members.

Today many families do not worry too much about the elderly members of their families. Often the elderly are put into rest homes where they spend all day in their room. Once in a rest home many family members feel that they are OK there and don't make the effort to go and visit very often.

Going in to visit and take the time to talk and have a special time with your family member/friend is so important to them, don't just think that they are OK.

Often when a family is living in all different places, or for other reasons,  there is one member of the family who does most of the caring for the person. If you are a member of a family where this is occurring and you are not the primary caregiver don't forget to acknowledge this and don't forget that it is often costing a lot of money to give your loved one the quality of life you would want for them. Do you envisage reimbursing some of this to the caregiver or do you just expect that that is what they should do? Just remember too that this caregiver can also become quite isolated due to their commitment - acknowledge and thank them appropriately - don't be half hearted about it, remember how much they are taking off your shoulders. Criticizing whatever they are doing does not help them. Just a few thoughts.

Heat

Poor George. We have been having some really hot weather and George does not cope well. I have noticed this with others. I find plenty of liquids and letting him have plenty of naps. He still gets very confused. He has a lot of trouble now recognising whether he is hot or cold and keeps putting clothes on and off - when this happens he is inclined to sit on the bed requiring me to wash him and the bed clothes. I do try to keep tabs on where he is going and what he is doing although this is not always easy.

Something I am very aware of ( and was re Mum as well ) not all family members let me know where they are and how to contact them in an emergency. The morning Mum had her stroke I went in to see her and then went to pick George up. Dropped home quickly to get somethings and send emails. I rang one of my sisters on the off chance she was home and luckily she was and was able to contact my other sister. I then took George with me and we went back to Mum.  So lucky. However we have had two close family member die and have had to get the police to help in locating other family members, this stress you don't need at this time.

If you are a family member just remember to let others in your family know where you are especially if you are going away.

Quality of life

Last week a community nurse told me that George had the best quality of life of any of the Alzheimer's people she dealt with. I felt really good that I have been able to provide this and I also did try to do that for Mum too. I was known amongst many of the medical people as a great advocator for both of them.

Something I do for George each night is:
When he gets into bed I put on a favourite movie and give him a red wine.

He has drunk red wine (lots of it) for many years. As of course, this is not good for the brain cells I do limit this now.

I try to hide the wine cask in different places but he always managed to find it and try to pour from it!! Wine all over the kitchen cupboards and floors. I finally found that by putting it in the oven he hasn't found it there.

Recently he found a box (with coffees) and thought that it was red wine.

Result:

 

He then tried to pour a red wine from the box on the left...

Yesterday I saw that the caregivers have not been doing a good job with his shaving. I made an appointment for him at a groom room. While we were waiting I watched as they gave two guys hair cuts. As part of the treatment they had scalp massages and then a shoulder/neck massage to finish - talk about pampering. He had a razor cut but was very tense throughout. The woman who did it was very good. I have booked him in for a hair cut in a couple of weeks. The price is about the same as his regular barber and so much nicer.

Got home to a massive flood! The dishwasher had started up all n its own and flooded the place. It took me ages to find the plug and turn it off. Got it off thank goodness and got someone in to look at it. They have taken it away to try to repair it - fingers crossed.

Let me tell you it is no fun trying to clean up with George making demands all the time.

I bought a new magazine today - guess what? It has mysteriously vanished into thin air. I suspect it is now cut up and I didn't see any of it...

Murphy's law

Got George from the home when I returned. He was able to tell me all about the home and he knew who had been in to see him. Very impressed that remembered that. He was very pleased to be coming home.

Unfortunately I got a chest infection on the plane (Murphy's law). Care givers often find their immunity systems get run down. I am taking plenty of vitamins etc. We are in the position of carrying on no matter how we feel while others can go to bed for a day or two and recover while it takes me some time - slow and steady.

I must say that it has been all on since I have been home.

Something George does a lot is cut up magazines and books. All the bits of paper are strewn over the floor. I am constantly picking the bits up. If I want to keep a book or magazine I need to hide it.

I need lots of cupboards with locks on!!