Online friends

When you in a situation like this online forums become most important.

On my birthday a lot of my old kids posted on my timeline. During the last five years it has been so nice to hear how much I meant to them. I have found that I do like to keep up with what people are doing it and this is a way I can do it.

I am aware that many people disclose far too much information in social media but this is where it can be a boon to some.

I do think that it is important that children are taught early on about how to use social media and about internet safety.

You are still IT

Even when your loved one is in a home you are still IT.

Today the nurse at the home rang the doctor's surgery who then rang me. Upshot is I have to take him to the doctor's tomorrow. Of course that will write off the afternoon. George is still going to our doctor.

In the home Mum was going to the doctor associated with the home. Quite a few times I was asked to go in to see the doctor with Mum. You always need to be available for their needs it is not a case of putting them into care and then just going in once a week or once a fortnight. You frequently get calls regarding all sorts of things relating to them and that was even with me in and out of Mum's home like a jack in the box.

Lunch

Took George out for lunch yesterday. We met some friends there. He knew who they were although not their names. He asked me what my christian name was as we walked across the road. He knows who I am but not necessarily my name. He rarely used my name and always had pet names for me. He rarely remembers names now although he recognises people.

When I arrived at the home the staff were just getting his things back in the drawers. He is regularly taking everything out and taking them all over the place. In there, there are not the number of clothes I deal with here on a daily basis.

He told our friends about going walkabout. He does remember that little episode but is not at all worried about it but sees it as an adventure. This time he said he was going to see the editor of the Press.

When George wants to go he starts to get restless. That is when I took him and we went back to the home. No problems, no talk of home etc.

He enjoyed going out.

Happy birthday to me

today was my birthday. Got a phone call early this morning from the boys in Auckland so that was a lovely way to wake up.

I had organised for two guys to help me getting some of our stuff up to the old house. This is giving me some space ready for the next lot of packing. It is taking a long time but I am gradually making headway. When we had finished I took the boys to a cafe for lunch which was nice.

Came home to a phone call from my sister in Brisbane so that was also nice to hear from her.

I then went over to the home to see George. I was going to take him out for coffee but when I saw him I realised it may be unsettling for him. We sat and chatted. I told him it was my birthday. He wished me a happy birthday and then undid the buttons down the front of his shirt. He reached inside his shirt and pulled out a folded advertising booklet which he gave me for my birthday. He was so thrilled with himself that he had that for me. I thanked him and we looked through the booklet together.

I asked him if he would like to go out for lunch tomorrow. He thought that was a great idea and I said we would go to Honeys. He was so excited and said, 'the Honeys'. I told him that yes it was. He told me about some new friends there. He seemed pretty happy and settled which is a great relief to me. Before he came in to the home I had explained carefully what I would be doing and how he would be coming home, this seems to be helpful to him.

I then popped in to the local mall on the way home and bought myself a caramel sundae for my birthday - I rarely have these so it was special.

All in all a pretty productive day.

Delusions

For some time now George has had some delusions. One I watched him use a knife a fork to eat a meal when there was nothing there.

He will tell me some one is at the door or somewhere else when no one is there. I just go and look with him and then say no one is there or something like that. I never argue with him. I have said that they must have gone or something similar.

This morning I went to visit him at the home. He was standing at the door of his room and told me that the man in there was dead. I poked my head in and told George he had gone. I then took him down to the lounge and chatted to him. He settled quickly and I left him with DVDs for them all to watch.

With the delusions I never correct him or tell him he is wrong or that no one is there. I simply reply as though what he has said is correct. That seems to work for him.

Missing

George got up in the middle of the night. I suggested that it was night time and to go back to bed. He was reluctant so I said I was and to go back to bed when he was ready. Usually this works. He hates being cold and likes to stay warm in bed. George never goes off our property on his own. Occasionally he will wander down to the old house or down to the letterbox but it is very rare and I always know as usually I have suggested it. He NEVER wanders off on his own, famous last words! 😢

Last night at some stage however he decided to go to see someone he worked with! He set off with only his onesie on and no walking stick.
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I woke up early, pitch black! It was before 5 a.m. No George. I searched all over the property inside and out. No George. I searched all over our old property, no George. I knew he wouldn't have gone to the beach as the track is too difficult for him now.

I walked to the two streets in each direction straight outside our place. No George!

I rang the police. This is where it is really hard being so totally on my own.

The police researched all the areas I had been. No George.

My front neighbours were up by then getting ready for work. They also helped in the search.

Finally he was found some considerable distance away down the road. They brought him home. I gave him some breakfast and chatted to him.

He said he was off to see someone he worked with and had some pages from a photograph album with him. At one point he knocked on somebody's window, luckily not waking them. He knew he was lost. Someone tied his shoe laces for him! Unfortunately he couldn't tell them where he lived. He did not have his identity bracelet on which has his name and phone number.

Thank God he didn't fall. Some very scary hours!

Decisions, decisions, decisions

I have been patiently waiting for alterations and repairs to be done to the property we live in. We have been waiting for over five years. During this time George's Alzheimers has progressed a lot as can be expected.

Last year I realised that it means that George and I, along with all property, have to leave the property for at least six months. George has to go into a rest home due to his condition and his incontinence. We will be paying big time for this.

I have been very worried about how this will affect George's condition. I arranged so that when it happens George's routine will continue as much as possible.  This has been done with the expectation that I would be bringing him home.

However I now think that this is unrealistic.

I have recently been told that his disease has progressed to a point where he will no longer be able to attend his club.

George is going in to respite care so I can do some packing, it is impossible with him around!


For the last two weeks his regular caregiver has been on leave so he has been having a lot of relievers. While some are good others are not. As a consequence it has been a difficult two weeks for me and George has been extremely confused. It is in the lap of the God's as to whether George will be able to come home after the six months. Increasingly it is looking less and less likely.